It
is said that from this pool the Dragon came for its food. Needless to say this Dragon was much the same as all other Dragons - it ate only 'Fair Damsels'. Gotta be My Kinda Dragon! The people, eager to placate the dragon, happily fed it their Fair Damsels until the only Fair Damsel left in the land was that of the King hisself! Hey, have you ever heard of a King NOT having a 'Fair Damsel' for a daughter? OK, OK current local Monarchy excepted! Well, as
you would imagine the King was reluctant to sacrifice his own Fair Damsel of a daughter and placed an advertisement in the Local paper for a hero. Now come on this is local folk lore and has to keep up with the times. In the telling of the tale in olden daze he would have issued a proclamation. In the not too distant future he would have used the Internet - at the moment we are not ready for that level of high technology! So, he placed an ad. and sure enuf a hero, recently returned from
overseas (Do you know why hero's have always "recently returned from overseas"? - coz if he was that good a catch some lucky lass would be snuggling up to him all nite already!). OK, so he arrived, presented himself to the King saying "I can save you daughter for a fate worse than death Sire!" And the King replied "Go forth brave knight and if you shall slay this wicked Dragon you can have her." Or words to that effect, it sounds vaguely familiar
methinks. The modern equivalent being along the line; "May I have your daughters hand?" to which Dad will reply "Why not? You have had everything else!" Right, back to the plot and the tale of the Knocker. The good knight stationed himself beside the pool and in the fullness of time the fearsome dragon appeared seeking its fair morsel. Upon seeing the Brave Knight it was somewhat taken aback and set about the Brave Knight with gusto. A fierce battle ensued which
raged for days with only short breaks for soothing massages from their respective sponsors' staff, quick sips of Robinson's Lemon Barley Water and bites of banana. Eventually good triumphed over evil and the Dragon strode away licking his lips only to get run over by a Big Mac, doing 20 over the limit in a built up area, in the next scene. Now wouldn't that be a turn up for the books? Unfortunately this is Folk Lore not Dragon Lore so, the BK whupped the Dragon big time and chopped off his
head - the Dragon's not his own. Unfortunately the BK was badly injured and was at death's door when the Fair Damsel remembered that she had taken a First Aid course at evening class and nursed the BK back to the rudest of rude health. They built a sweet little cottage and continued to be rude inside it. After selling the film rights to a certain Mr. W. Disney they lived happily ever after. As with all good stories there are variations. Ver II.
The Dragon was slain by trickery. Now that is underhand and obviously not the action of a Sussex man, musta bin an incommer! A Giant Sussex Pie was made. It was so big it had to be delivered to the pool by Pickfords. The vehicle thinly disguised as a very large farm cart and pulled by an even larger horse! The Monster took one sniff of the local delicacy and scoffed the lot! Pie, pie dish, cart, horse and all! He then popped down to the local
Chemist for a packet of heartburn tablets. But all was not well for it was not heartburn but the effects of the poison with which the pie was heavily laced. Just goes to show the people could have got rid of all the old crones in the area as the Dragon clearly had no taste. St. Leonard and his DragonIn the small village of Colgate near the northern border of
the county there is a rather nice public house known as 'The Dragon'. This does not refer to the landlady but to a time in ancient history, long before MIL (Mother In Law) when a Dragon terrorised the local population. This local Dragon was HUGE! OK, 'fess up - have you ever heard of a small Dragon? This Dragon didn't have a particular interest in Fair Damsels (hey, what kind of Dragon story is this?) but it did roam around the forest seeking its prey. One day the good people of Horsham
realised that the Dragon was getting closer and closer to their town. Unlike the King in the earlier story they were short of funds and could not afford an advert and certainly had not connection with the Internet (nasty new fangled device - witchcraft!). They did the next best thing - they prayed, boy did they pray? They prayed aloud and probably in harmony AND not just on Sundays! As with all good stories their prayers were answered in the form of the 'Good St. Leonard'. He
hopped the fast train, changing at Crawley and arrived in the nick of time. Without pausing for refreshment or even seeking to discover how fair the local damsels were he sallied forth into the forest. He searched high and low, hither, thither and yon until, at last, he came upon the fearsome beast sharpening its claws and burnishing its yellowed teeth (long before fluoride kids). "Hi, Len! Bin waiting for yer. Take five and get your breath back, I'm a fair Dragon!"
"Thank s Eric, you're a gent." Said Len as he set about the warm up exercises that his personal trainer had prescribed prior to any form of mortal combat. Now you might think that Eric (The Dragon) might poke fun at our hero but far from it. He joined in! Stood right beside him and copied his every move. After a few minutes they began to chat about this and that, nothing in particular and everything in general. The topics ranged wide including the state of local politics,
the Arts and the latest in man-about-town fashions. Eventually Eric (The Dragon) felt comfortable enough with Our Hero to broach the subject that really bothered him. "So, Len, tell me! Why, exactly, have you rushed down from the big city to slay me?" "Why? Because you frighten the townsfolk and eat their fair maidens!" "Well, there's the rub y'see! I only pop into town now and then, just the outskirts you understan'? to catch up on the local news,
the soaps and just to hear a bit of gossip - that's how I knew you were comming! It's lonely here in the forest for an intelligent dragon. As for the eating of fair maidens? Well, I've not so much as breathed hot breath into a maidens ear much less eaten one!" To be honest, a couple of hundred years ago, when I was a young up and coming dragon my mum gave me a bit of maiden to try. Let me tell you I was picking hairs out of my teeth for so long afterwards I just vowed 'Never Again'!"
Len, Our Hero, was much taken aback by these revelations and the two would be combatants sat beneath a shady beech tree to further discuss the matter. Some hours later, when most of the camp followers had departed and only the main sponsors, the skimpily clad damsels (supplied by the promoters to ensure the best TV coverage) that would parade around the arena at each break with the round number cards and sundry n'ere do wells were left they both arose. An agreement had been
reached. Obviously, as it was an agreement between Our Hero and the supposed villain there is no actual written record of the exact detail of the terms and conditions. However, suffice to say that it is rumoured that there was an agreement that ran along the following lines. The two adversaries would appear to engage in deadly combat BUT, and this is the important bit so pay attention, they would seek not to damage each other in any serious way. Minor bloodshed was permitted as the
townsfolk would expect to see same damage inflicted on Our Hero upon his return to the town. However, as Eric was not at all a bad dragon and Len was rather hoping to become a St. in the near future he could not be seen to slay an innocent dragon. After a long and energetic battle Eric would feign death and Len would march off victorious. Whereupon Eric, after a brief rest would move a few more miles from the town and keep in touch with the world via the radio that Len would accidentally
leave on the battle-field. Battle was joined and our two players enjoyed themselves immensely. They had agreed that should one of them become dangerously tired he would fall upon one knee. The battle would be stopped, for a few words from the sponsors, cups of tea and the parade of the scantily clad damsels (to ensure the best TV coverage). After a judicious time they would re-group and continue. The battle raged for hours, days, weeks! The sponsors were happy! Copious quantities
of tea were consumed! The TV coverage was very, very good! Then, disaster! Eric (The Dragon) needed a comfort break and started to go down upon his knee when he slipped. Len, to be fair, was equally tired and instead of moving swiftly back he just stopped in his tracks! Eric could not stop himself and plunged onto the upturned point of Len's sword! Len was mortified! Eric, his mate, was dead! Len fled the battlefield his droplets of blood, from his many superficial wounds,
scattered onto the ground where they eventually blossomed into Lily's of the Valley. Len ran away, he knew not where until eventually he found a pub. He drank 3 swift pints of ale with whisky chasers until his remorse was reduced somewhat - or he was more than a little intoxicated. "Landlord, where am I?" he asked. "Why, Sir, you are in my pub!" "I know that Landlord but what is the name of your pub?"
"It don't have a name Sir." Len sat in silent contemplation for some considerable time then asked… "Landlord, would you consider naming your pub after a dear, departed friend of mine?" " I would be honoured, Sir. What is your friends name?" And that, Dear Reader, is the end of this tale. Epilogue; Len got his St. and they named the forest after him! You don't believe the story is true? Well, let me tell you. There are
still Lily's of the Valley to be found in the quiet corners of the forest AND there is still a pub called Eric err no, sorry "The Dragon" in St. Len's forest! So it must be a true story! Ver II As with all good stories there is another version. It would appear that around the 1600's another dragon was spotted by 3 local people (not local to
you, maybe, but local to Horsham). They gave similar accounts of a fearsome beast. An enterprising London man 'researched' the matter and eventually produced a learned paper in 1614, on the subject. "A true and Wonderful Discourse relating to a strange and monstrous Serpent (or Dragon) lately discovered, and yet living, to the great annoyance… I 'spect it sold well, but I do prefer my version! Reality? Fossil remains of an Iguanodon were found
in 1825 not many miles from the area in Tilgate Forest. Between January 1939 and February 1941 further fossil remains were found in the Clock House brick works about 6 miles from Horsham. Could it be that the area might be "The Land that time forgot?" I'll leave you to decide. | 
